napkin notes

I remember it all too well.  I remember sitting on my yellow duvet with a bowl of lucky charms when "Lover" came out. I had to wait 10 minutes for my ancient MacBook Pro hand-me-down to boot up and open Spotify before I could hit play. I remember being 11 years old and hiding my Kindle Fire under my pillow while I listened to the "Speak Now" album to fall asleep each night. I remember listening to " reputation" with my friend Ally the day it came out. We were on our way back from Barnes and Noble, in the back of her mom's car. She got in trouble for downloading it without asking. I remember waking up to 50 text notifications telling me Taylor Swift surprise-dropped "folklore" in the middle of the night. I thought I was still dreaming, because no way! I remember being maybe 7 years old, and my babysitter asking me if I wanted to listen to country or pop on the radio. "Which one is Taylor Swift?" I said. They didn't play Taylor, a...

in: drinking espresso  movies>tv repeating outfits blowouts and big hair the 60s  scarves libraries chelsea boots, white sneakers, timeless shoe styles maroon, burgandy, dark red, etc  magazines and print media outs:  stan culture/celebrity worship  colleen hoover and tiktok romance books just literally all of social media fast fashion, specifically HM and Shein. (seriously, if you're buying off of shein in 2024 get help) panera  ugg tasman slippers people with ugly personalities slick back hair every day of the week alix earle  gym culture microtrends anything with that disgusting y2k flower pattern (see below): ruched bodycon dresses, specifically the ones with the ruching down the middle. honestly, anything with ruching down the middle. 

I've attempted sitting down and writing my 2023 review many, many times. But every time I start to type, it turns into a horribly depressing slew of sad musings, grievances, anger, heartache, and at its very core—hurt. New Year's used to be my favorite holiday. Now, I hold down on the backspace because maybe I will try later to recall something happy. It's unlike me to forget, and 2023 is no exception. I felt like this year I was holding on to a lot more. I had 2023 in my front pocket, and 2022 in the back pocket, 2005-2016 in my purse, 2016-2018 in coat... you get the picture. I was entirely weighed down by the past because in the face of present struggles it glowed with such endearment. 2023 was a year of change, so many changes. It turned me upside down, shook me silly, put me back down, and while I wasn't paying attention, kicked me in the stomach—or so it felt. And along with change comes comparison, which is the thief of joy, as Roosevelt said. He wasn't wrong...